Rio CWAX2 Total Body Waxing - Adventures in PCOS

Okay peeps! I want to start reviewing products here, and I figured the best place to start is with a product I use regularly myself.

But first, a bit of backstory. I suffer from a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). You can find more info on that here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polycystic_ovarian_syndrome.

One of the big issues with PCOS is an increased level of body hair. Some women might get a little bit of extra tummy fuzz, some get full blown body hair nightmares especially if they have darker hair. Since I'm pale and ginger, I consider myself somewhere in the middle as a lot of my hair is basically see through. If I had dark hair however, I think I might look like this guy:

Okay maybe not that bad, but pretty awful. Also I think he might be a bit thinner than me (so jealous). 

I manage everything below the neck myself, through a combination of shaving and depilatory cream. Above the neck however is a completely different story. Above the neck, I am basically the thing internet men fear and revile the most: A woman with facial hair. 

Over the years I've tried almost every hair removal treatment going. Plucking, shaving, at home waxing, depilatory creams, those weird things where you buff the hair off. Everything short of electrolysis. I've never tried that because a) I'm poor as heck, and b) that stuff looks scary and kinda painful. I've even said to hell with it and let the hair grow, hoping to become sassy and empowered. Sadly I just became miserable and shy, as without hair removal treatments I have a pretty gnarly mustache and beard.

Most of the aforementioned treatments removed the hair, but also left me with some pretty awful side effects. Stubble, ingrown hairs, chemical burns, and painful bits from pretty much sanding my skin with those buffers. Salon grade waxing was the only thing that worked. But oh man, the expense.

Obviously salon prices vary worldwide, but in my local walk in fairly cheap salon it cost me £12.50 for an eyebrow, lip and chin wax. But that was on a good day. Some days I'd go in and be charged £20. Or £10. Or 3 goats and a button. Then there was the clothes ruined by dripping wax. Or getting a half done wax because the salon is so busy. Even just walking in and asking for that specific treatment is an obstacle, because who wants to advertise "HEY YOU GUYS I HAVE A HAIRY FACE!"?

These waxes only lasted 3 weeks at best, and if my fuzzy head maths is correct it works out at about £220 a year just for waxing. That's over 2 weeks income for me so it really wasn't sustainable. 

I finally bit the bullet and ordered the Rio CWAX2 Total Body Waxing kit, which you can find on the Rio website here: http://www.riobeauty.co.uk/rio-hair-removers/waxing/total-body-waxing.html.

I ordered mine from Very.co.uk: http://www.very.co.uk/rio-cwax2-total-body-waxing/926754475.prd?cmtag=o&_requestid=192618&prdToken=/p/prod14260743-sku24222052-AI&browseToken=/q/pk142&totalResults=1

It retails from both sites at around £40. Personally, I ordered mine from Very.co.uk as it lets you pay for items over a 3 month period which is awesome. Usually with catalogues there's a big mark up on the retail price, but Very seem to be really reasonably priced, especially in this case! However I should point out, if I had the money available I would have no issues buying direct from Rio as their customer service has always been really good and I really like their products.

Okay, onto the kit itself.

The kit contains:

1x Heater

1 x Waxing Pan

3 x Hard Wax Tablets
400ml Soft Creme Wax

Strips

50ml Wax Cleaning Fluid
20 Wooden Spatulas

Instructional DVD 

If I'm completely honest, I've not watched the DVD. Personally, I'd much prefer a little booklet or sheet but maybe that's just me. I'm sure the DVD is really handy, especially for first time waxers. Luckily, the product page for the kit on the Rio website has full instructions for using both kinds of wax contained in the kit. 

So far, I've only used the hard wax as it's designed for more sensitive areas like your face and that's the only place I'm waxing. But given my experiences with the hard wax and the overall kit I've got no doubts that the soft wax is also really good.

With the hard wax tablets, a little seems to go a long long way. Since you can just leave the wax to harden in the pan for next time (or maybe only I do that and it's super gross?), there's no waste, and I would say I'm averaging about a quarter of a tablet per waxing. Which is really, really, cost effective as a refill of 3 tablets is £3.95. You can find the refills here: http://www.riobeauty.co.uk/wax-tablets-x-3.html

An added bonus of the hard wax is the gorgeous smell it gives off when melted. It's like a yummy vanilla candle scent and it just fills the room. Beautiful! 

The heater itself is really impressive. When I first took it out the box I thought it looked a bit tacky and flimsy but I realise now it's only going to get covered in bits of wax so who cares as long as it does the job? Another small gripe is the kinda short cable. Unless your plug sockets are high up, don't plan on putting this higher than a dressing table. Although for safety reasons, you probably shouldn't do that anyway! The length is fine for me but I can see that others might have an issue. 

 From other peoples experiences, it seems to take around 60 minutes to heat the soft wax, and only about 20 for the hard wax. I would say 15-20 minutes for the hard wax, enough time to maybe have a brew, cleanse your face and cut up some strips. The thing I love about the heater is the outside of it gets warm, but you're not going to burn yourself on it. I was imagining an Arrested Development Cornballer type scenario but nope! I am CONSTANTLY burning myself on things, and I feel pretty safe around this! 

Let's get on to the actual waxing. Super easy. I'm not going to tell you how to wax, you know that already, or like I said before there are instructions on the Rio site. However.. One piece of advice I can give  you is this. For the love of god cut up some of the paper strips to use with the hard wax. The Rio website seems to suggest you just put the wax on, let it cool a bit then pull it off. I tried this once and only once. Unless you have a masochistic streak, do not try that method. If you use the paper strips with the hard wax there's literally almost zero pain. I genuinely have to keep checking that the hair is coming off because it just doesn't hurt. 

The paper strips included are surprisingly good quality. I'll admit that when I got the kit, I thought I would give them a go but I was expecting to make a trip to my local Sally store for cotton strips. I've used paper strips with a previous home waxing kit and they just sort of fell off my face in an expensive but useless way. The paper strips included in this kit stick to the wax and pull it off easily but you do have to get the strip on the wax QUICKLY. Although I feel I should mention, make sure you apply the slightly fuzzy side to the wax. If you use the slightly rougher side, you're going to be picking dried wax off your face for a while. 

The spatulas included are... well.. wooden spatulas. There's not much you can really say about that! My only complaint is they're far too big for eyebrows. Luckily I've found a way round  this by grabbing a few extra coffee stirrers every time I go to Costa! The stirrers are the perfect size for eyebrows!

The final piece of kit is the wax cleaner. This is a little bottle of oil similar to baby oil. Just put a few drops on a strip and wipe off any remaining waxy bits. Really handy stuff, and if you give all your waxed bits a quick swipe of this it'll stop them drying out before you can get moisturiser on! 

Okay so my overall opinion:

Man, this thing is awesome. Legitimately awesome. I received mine in early March, I've used it 3 times and since 3 x £12.50 = £37.50, it's basically paid for itself. It does take a bit of practice to get good at this, but really it's not rocket science. You just have to accept that for the first few times you're going to get waxy, and you might miss a couple of hairs but with practice you'll sort that out. The refills for all the consumables are available on the Rio website for really reasonable prices (much cheaper than I expected!) but even then if you need them quickly, there's always stores like Sallys.

As a woman with PCOS this thing is a godsend. I can deal with hair when I want to, cheaply, in the privacy of my own home. I honestly can't recommend it highly enough!

Pros: Quick, easy, cheap, pain free, safe (no burns!), smells lush

Cons: Short cable, no paper instructions, no small spatulas

AW YISSSSSS

WHAT IS UP 2013?

So.. almost 2 years to the day since I deserted my blog, leaving it languishing alone and unloved in blogger hell, I have returned.

But here's the weird part.

I was still getting views. I don't think a single day has gone by without at least 1 page view. Which quite frankly boggles my mind. So obviously, I have to give the people more of what they want. Me (duh). 

For my followers (and not just randomers coming here from a google search for pokemon boobs [wtf!?!]) you might notice a few changes.

1) A new name! Sadly, chicgeek82 is no longer "a thing", and my jewelry business has had a bit of a makeover. We are now Kitty Boo, named after the irrepressible Boo the cat. I am not 100% sure how she feels about having a business named after her. I've tried asking a few times but she tends to just bite me if I address her directly. And sometimes even if I don't. 

2) A new layout! I've come to accept that however much I love acid pink leopard print, not everyone shares that opinion. Let's be honest; between the (awesome) hideous wallpaper, the matching pink blog backgrounds, and the very questionable almost Comic Sans font, the whole thing was a hot mess. All I was missing was a few "Blingee" sparkle gifs. That is not cool for anyone.

2A) Incidentally, I love the term "hot mess"

2B) Back to the layout. Right now, I'm using a "PICK FROM THIS LIST OF TEMPLATES" background supplied by blogger.com. Mainly because I don't entirely trust myself. Because any moment I could snap and use that really awesome multicoloured neon leopard print. Really. And who wouldn't love that? Clue: Your eyes. 

2C) A PICTURE OF THE AUTHOR. Yeah. Finally you get to see my awful face. That is me posing in my car on one of the rare sunny days we get in Scotland. A week later on another one of those rare days, I got sunburn so bad I couldn't move for a week.

3) I've decided to take blogging in a different direction. Mostly. I'm still going to blog about random stuff I think about (e.g. the elusive cat belly button) but I'm probably not going to be reviewing/featuring Etsy stuff, or doing Dr Who catch up stuff. Dr Who, mainly because I am still just FURIOUS about Amy and Rory being written out. And now Matt Smith is leaving so overall I'm just mad. MAD AS HECK.

3A) OK I feel like I needed a new section because I got pretty intense about Dr Who for a moment there. Going forward, I'm planning on reviewing stuff. Nothing specific, like I'm not going to start the worlds number 1 blog site for reviewing bike seat cozies or something (note to self: totally do this). That would require a lot of posting from Etsy tbh, they love stuff like that. I'm going to review stuff that I like, stuff that I use, stuff that I want to use and stuff I enjoy or find helpful. Hell I might even review the cat at some point. 

4) OH MAN DON'T FEAR THE REAPER JUST CAME ON THE RADIO. DO Y'ALL WATCH SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE?  I can't hear that song now without picturing Will Ferrel just rocking out so hard on that cowbell. Awesome. 

Okay. I think that's everything for now. So stick with me, it could be fun, it could be horrendous, it could be a terrible trip into the psyche of a woman who genuinely thought that background was a good idea. 

I'm hoping to do another post later on today, but in the meantime, have an update photo of the bloody cat. Boo, it's what's for dinner. 

That Damn Cat

Hello ladles and jellyspoons! Today's blog is going to be a giant image dump of the best cat in the world, Boo. Mainly because she's decided to start napping with me again (yay!), and also because quite frankly the world needs more Boo. A lot more. 


So here we go...

First of all, I would like to dispel any rumours that Boo has any dignity whatsoever. Because she doesn't. You think this is bad? I've seen her eat her own poop. FROM HER BUTTFUR. (lolz whats a buttfur.. fur pooping silly! Oh my god that's awful, I'm sorry) She is also a big fan of trashy celebrity magazines like OK and Hello! They're definitely not mine. Bloody cat. Boo can also be seen in close proximity to some of her other favourite things, i.e. cables. Boo loves her some cables. Especially daddy's expensive DJ headphone cables. Oops. 

This is sullen emo Boo. Lying in bed, no doubt thinking of some really deep and meaningful My Chemical Romance lyrics and wondering why life is so unfair. If only she had opposable thumbs to write in a journal.  And it's not because I won't buy her a pony because she has a giant pony that she sometimes sleeps on. I think life as a cat is just a bit tiring sometimes. Also pictured, is her best friend Monsieur Plisken. Like his namesake, I think he only has one eye left now as well. Because Boo ate the other. She also ate both the eyes of the original Monsieur Plisken. It's like raising a tiny Hannibal Lecter.

The Gang Gets a New Member! And it is Boo. Boo has previously shown no interest in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, however I think Charlie's strange affinity for cats is working its magic on her. Should we get her some kitten mittons? Who is more badass, Boo or Special Agent Jack Bauer the junkyard cat? Can Boo actually flatten herself and slip through the seams in the wall? Was Boo also born in a pool of gasoline on a sheet of rusty metal? If you don't watch It's Always Sunny, then this will all be lost on you. And SHAME ON YOU SIR. SHAME! 

AAAH! EYES! Now imagine waking up to this, 4 bony little paws sinking between your ribs, hot tuna breath whistling across your cheeks then BAM! EYES. All up in your grill. What is even scarier is when she does this in the dark, and all you can see is shadow.. and I wake up, freaking out and screaming AAAH BATMAN! Because lets be fair here, a pointy eared cat shadow does look a LOT like Batman... *ahem* You can also see in the distance, Boo's "sleepin' on" pony. Unfortunately she then gets stuck up there and cries until we help her down. Worst cat ever.

Poop Bear

What is up bitches! Yes, sorry, I know.. I should be coming to you, cap in hand saying "I'm so sorry for deserting my blog for almost 2 weeks while I was off doing God knows what, possibly sky diving from a plane into a moving car and driving off to Monte Carlo where I won a fortune, hijacked a yacht and foiled international jewel thieves". I guess the sorry part is true? The rest, not so much. In reality, I got blood tests, let someone take x rays of my brain and didn't poop for like.. a week. Is that TMI? Possibly. But oh man, it sucks when that happens. Now I know why grizzly bears are so grumpy and maul people all the time when they're coming out of hibernation. They haven't pooped since like.. October, and now it's May. Obviously that's completely made up.. I have no idea when bears go into hibernation. 


Okay so I intended this to be my "DUN DUN DUNN! DR WHO KIND OF FINALE BLOG", but I'm going to be posting that later as I have the energy of something not very energetic right now. This is not related to the poop. 


So, where have I been? Umm.. I've been in my house, with occasional trips to the supermarket, the hospital and the doctors surgery. Life has NOT been exciting. I won't harp on about being ill, but let's just say that whatever "Mystery Illness" I have, it best come with one simple tablet to make it all better. Because I can't go on not functioning like this. I never thought I'd get upset about not working, and not being a travel agent but yep, I'm pretty bummed. There's something else you didn't know about me, I used to be a travel agent. Granted it was only for a year but it was a pretty kickass job and I learned so much. My speciality was the U.S.A, specifically the West Coast, NYC and Orlando. You wanna party on the Strip? You come to me. Except not now, because I'm not a travel agent any more :( 


Moping aside, have you seen Katy Perry's new video for Last Friday Night? Oh man I love it. And so many retro stars! I might have actually said "HOLY SHIT A COREY!" at one point. I *think* it's Corey Feldman because I'm pretty sure Corey Haim is dead. I could be making that up though. No, I just checked, he's dead. And looks like an anorexic George Clooney in his Wikipedia picture. Weird. I also love Katy's hair in this, I'm gonna be spending all weekend locked in a room with my crimpers and hairspray and root boost oh my! If you haven't already, go check out the "Kathy Beth Terry" videos, they might explain a bit more about what's actually going on! 


So I think that's about it. I'll be getting back to my usual "Blahblahblah stuff about a thing blahblah here's some Etsy stuff Dr Who blahblah" in the next couple of days hopefully. Although I may have to watch the Dr Who almost kind of finale episode again! Byebye :) 

Tom Cruise and a Shark Fetus walk into a bar...

So it's 2:48 am on a Tuesday morning, and being the shiftless, jobless wastrel I am, I'm still awake. Oh no. This is a problem of late, as my sleep goes in bizarre circular patterns, where one day I'm tucked up in bed by 9pm, then a few days later I'm still up at this time. Mainly because I was asleep until 1pm having a weird dream about kicking ass and taking names with Brock Samson. Seriously. I need to stop watching the Venture Brothers before bed. Let's not even start on my dreams about The Office. 

I was planning on stealing an idea from a good friend of mine (Hi Pete!), where you write terrible movie reviews from memory. This was a cool idea until I realised a) I remember too much about awful movies, and b) Pete might kick my ass. That's pretty unlikely though, as 99% of my friends don't even know about this blog. Mainly because I don't want them being all "hurr your blog is dumb, no one cares what you think about a Pokemon". 

Not that I only write about Pokemon but you get the idea. There is also the problem of friends who are more creative than I ever will be, and friends who are far more verbose (Hi again Pete!).  My only saving grace is if anyone ever finds this, I can just say "Yeah? Well remember the time you wrote that prog rock epic about Henry VIII that lasted 30 minutes? And I stood up for the entire thing in platform heels? Yeah? Well shut up!" 

I have weird friends. 

I have, however, decided to write about movies anyway. But not movie reviews from memory.. no. Today, you get to learn how I am the worst Film student ever. Here's something you didn't know. I have a BA in Film and Media. Get me! chicgeek82 BA (Hons). I always feel a bit like Mr T when I tell people I have a BA. Sucka. 

I learned 2 things from that course. Here they are in no specific order.

1) When Jaws was released, shark fetuses were sold in jars as souvenirs.

2) Something about Top Gun. Don't know what though.

Granted, a lot of my time at University was spent partying like an aged rockstar, but you'd think I would come away with a bit more than that? Surely? I must at least have an awesome taste in films, and a DVD collection full of classics. 

No. 

Ladies and gentlemen, I have never seen The Godfather. Or The Graduate. Or Annie Hall. Think of a classic movie. Got it? Yeah? I probably haven't seen it. 

However, my DVD collection contains such classics as: Zombie Strippers, Driller Killer, Crank, Dark Floors (The Lordi Movie), all 3 Transporter movies and 48 Weeks Later which has the tagline "The Bums are eating the Cops!". 

A friend of mine has a secret cupboard where he stores all his embarassing movies. Me? I keep 'em on the rack, pride of place. 

It's like I have some magnet in my head that instantly draws me to terrible, terrible movies. I've been bodily dragged from a shop so I wouldn't buy a copy of Transmorphers. I've cackled in glee at Snakes on a Train. Tonight, I watched Jason Statham shoot a stripper in the tits, then laughed as the implant goo ran out. Me and my fancy book learnin'... 

I recently started a LoveFilm trial (I guess it's kind of like the UK version of Netflix). This was going to be my chance to redeem myself and rent only highbrow movies that would expand my horizons. Or something. I put Annie Hall on the list. I tried to get Black Swan but it was all rented out.. so uh.. I chose a film called Rubber instead. 

Rubber is a film about a killer tyre.

£12,000 to learn something about Top Gun that I forgot.  

I never should have laughed when that one girl said her favourite movie was Titanic. 

Reverse the Polarity of the Neutron Flow!

Yes yes worst blogger ever, never on time, could do better if she just applied herself. But! AH HA! It's not my fault this time! Nyaaaah! I haven't actually been able to log into blogger since about Wednesday. I've been trying! Trying reeeeally hard, but no dice. And now I can log in. You lucky people. 


The angry bees in my throat are still not gone but merely come and go now. So it's not so bad. 

On to Dr Who!  I just found out that because of Memorial Day, the US won't be getting this episode until next week so... 


*** SPOILERS AHEAD IF YOU LIVE IN THE USA! ***

Wow! So uh.. the poop really hit the fan this week huh guys? 


We'll get to all the OMG parts in a little bit, but we should probably talk about the episode as a whole maybe... maybe. Ok.  I have a confession. I sat through the entire episode and watched it but I missed SO much. This is mainly because I watched in my mums living room (we have separate living rooms, how posh are we? Not very.) and her television directly faces the sun. And you're not allowed to close the curtains. Closing the living room curtains is like biting the head off a statue of Baby Jesus, on Christmas morning, after taking a dump INSIDE the turkey. She doesn't like it. On top of that, my dad sets the brightness so low, any night time scenes are reminiscent of the darkest parts of The Blair Witch Project. I'm not sure if this is because he misses the days of black and white TV, or he thinks more colour costs extra. Anyway...


Yeah. I missed a lot of action but I have the basic gist of everything and I promise I will watch it again on iPlayer. 


I'll be honest, as the second part of a two parter I found this episode a bit lackluster. There were parts that I really, really enjoyed but in comparison to last week, I don't think it held up as well as it should. Last week's episode, I compared that to The Thing.. This weeks was more a filler episode of the X Files.

My main problem? The god awful CGI. Dr Who has some AMAZING villains sometimes. Look at all the work that goes into Cybermen, Daleks, Judoon and The Ood. And then look at the dreadful CGI plop we got this week. Empress of the Racnoss, that was a woman in a suit and make up. Probably one of the most (visually) impressive Dr Who bad guys in a long time. And yet they still think it's appropriate to include wibbly CGI like this. I appreciate budgets don't stretch awfully far, but you would think for one of the BBC's flagship programs they could do a bit better? Even the gorilla cyberman thing covered in black mopheads was less ridiculous! 


It was also a very touchy feely type of episode. However! It was also quite fun in places. And very much like the olden days of Dr Who. Lots of running around corridors, getting trapped in places, having to do X Y and Z or we would all die... Awesome stuff. My favourite part? Ganger Doctor going all wibbly because of his previous regenerations and quoting older Doctors with things about Jelly Babies and Reversing the Polarity of the Neutron Flow! 


Okay.. on to what EVERYBODY wants to talk about. Amy is a ganger. Oh em gee. Here is the theory from my household: Amy was real Amy until she was taken by The Silence. She doesn't know how long they had her. This is when she had a "Flesh" copy made, and this copy has been pretending to be Amy since..  Because:
Amy tells the Doctor she's pregnant. Then she's taken by The Silence. Then she tells the Doctor she's not pregnant. The scanner is saying pregnant/not pregnant because real Amy IS pregnant, her Ganger ISN'T but they're linked to each other. As for why she's in that tube with the woman looking in on her etc etc... I have no idea. All I know is it made me a bit claustrophobic! 


Also.. Amy told the REAL Doctor that she saw him die, not the Ganger Doctor like she thought. Ruh roh! So uh.. who can't wait for next weeks episode? Wowza! 


On to pretty Etsy things! This week I'm going for a "Previous Doctors" theme:

Season 12 Scarf

Would you look at the size of that?! This scarf is HUGE. Huge and awesome. Tom Baker as the Doctor will always have a spot in my heart, as that's what got me interested in the whole thing. Remember the one with the giant green glowing maggots? Yeah.. that one. It was awesome being off school for a month and watching Dr Who all day. I adore this scarf. I'm genuinly amazed at the amount of work that must have gone into it, completely justifying the price tag! This will definitely keep you warm this winter! Wow! 

Doctor Who 8x8 Print

All the Doctors except Mr Smith! What makes me sad is that people count Paul McGann as the 8th Doctor. Ugh that whole thing was awful. Was Paul McGann in The Upper Hand or was that his brother? Not that that matters. Obviously for continuity and numbers etc etc, Paul McGann is the 8th Doctor. Enough of that. This print is brilliant! My favourite part is the fact that such a simple print has managed to capture the personality of each Doctor so well! Sylvester McCoy and his cheeky little face, Jon Pertwee looking a bit grumpy.. love it! And the little quote, "Saving the Galaxy one face at a time..." That's ace! 

Handmade Crochet Catnip Toy - Ood

Okay I know I said I was going for a previous Doctors sort of thing this week, but hey.. Previous Doctors have fought The Ood right? And if you don't think this little guy is badass then.. well... shhh! What could be cuter than coming home to find your pet cat snuggling with an Ood? Well, a lot of things probably. But a cute little stuffed, crocheted Ood filled with Catnip? Nothing! That is the epitome of cute! As soon as I have spare pennies, Boo cat is definitely getting one of these for her bad self! 

In conclusion, this weeks Dr Who was awesome. I remain awesome, albeit a little bit grumpy and sore. Further blog posts will come, assuming I can dodge tidying a giant cupboard and my angry bee sore throat doesn't drive me insane. Happy Memorial Day in the US and Happy Bank Holiday Piss Up BBQ day in the UK! If you're in another country.. well, Happy Monday I guess? Except it's Tuesday now, so uh.. yeah. 

Kind of like I ate 5 angry bees...

So we've previously established that I love to complain. If there's something to complain about, BAM! I'm right at the front of the queue. Do you have any idea how insufferable it is to live with me when I'm ill?

I'm illllllllllllllllllllllll. Well, no. If I had some sort of explosive food poisoning or maybe I had been bitten on the nose by a bat and then went to live under the porch only to come out and harass that nice woman and her kid in the car out there because I have RABIES, then yeah maybe you could say I was ill. You could also say I probably read too much trashy Stephen King but that's a whole other matter. The long and short of it is, my throat hurts.

Oh man, does my throat hurt. In my 28 and a bit years on this planet I've had pretty much every throat pain ever. Stabby ones, achey ones, those weird ones that sometimes happen and it makes you smell funny things... I've even had tonsillitis. But this one is just.. ugh. My throat is SO dry. That's what's causing the pain and annoyance and whining. A dry throat. But it's so dry it feels like it's sticking to itself. How gross is that?

I've had drinks.. I've had mints and various other sweets.. I've tried shouting at it but that doesn't work because my throat is too sore to shout. Even my sweet sweet cigarettes, my only vice in the world, are causing me pain. And they're menthol! Menthol is minty, minty things help when you're ill! 


And I keep swallowing, and doing this clicky thing with my throat. Like I'm a dolphin maybe. Except if I was a dolphin I'd be saying "hey dolphins, this sucks, my throat hurts.. I'm not doing any goddam backflips today, screw you Seaworld!" It's probably okay being a dolphin with a sore throat, because you're surrounded by all that salt water. Salt water helps.. except this time. 


Today I had to go to TWO supermarkets which is my least favourite thing to do on earth, and now I feel so foul I came home and got straight into my pajamas. Then I started looking for things on Etsy that would make me feel better. So far I found these: 

Cute as a Button Pug Long Yoga Pants

Pugs! Pajamas! Two of my favourite things, finally together! If you don't like pugs, well, I don't know what to tell you. Except that you are wrong. Pugs are the most superior doggies on Earth, because they turn even the hardest man into a bubbling pile of mush after just 5 minutes of "awww wookit his widdle smushy face d'aawwwww". Pugs rock my socks. These yoga pants are just.. oh man they're amazing. I want to buy them and live in them forever.

EDIT: I just got a message from nicandthenewfie who make these wonderful yoga pants, and they're offering 15% off all items in their store if you use the code chicgeek . How cool are they? You should go buy looooads from them for being so awesome :) 

Vanilla Horehound Hard Candies

Little tiny bears to soothe your sore throat. What could be better? These little dudes are organic, vegan and come in other flavours including cinnamon, peppermint, lime and orange! How good is that? Because I don't know about you, but I get pretty tired of sucking on those awful throat lozenges that come in flavours like "Rubbing Alcohol and Lemon", "Blackcurrant and Disinfectant" and "Honey and Floor Cleaner". Apart from the fact I nearly called them "Horehouse Hard Candies", these are brilliant! 

Leopard Faux Fur Hot Water Bottle Cover

Now, living in Scotland you would think I'd be used to the ridiculous temperatures and having all 4 seasons in one day. You would be wrong. Right now, it's the end of May and we have 100mph winds and hail. HAIL. At this second, I can think of nothing better than curling up in bed, under my duvet with this hot water bottle cover. And a hot water bottle obviously. Look at it! It's all furry and warm.. and it's leopard print which is my number one favourite print in the whole wide world. Even my phone wallpaper is an eye burning acid green leopard print. If it was real, that leopard would have no chance in the wild. No sir. Oh, I should also mention, this hot water bottle cover comes with a free sachet of lavendar right now, so not only is it awesome and furry etc etc but it will smell nice AND help you sleep! Bargain! 

In conclusion, I still feel awful and grumpy and will no doubt regale you with more tales of woe for the rest of the week. Boo hoo.